Monthly Archives: January 2014

Reasons to be thankful…

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Just a short one this…I may start a *Thankful Jar* but I may not…Journalling & the like are not strong points of mine…Critical thinking (of others yes, I do it too often I confess, but especially of myself) on the other hand – I’m a pro…

Still, I am drawn to the idea of a gratitude journal or a thankful jar, and whilst I have not yet mastered the art of writing daily in my journal, I do have a book of gratitudes that I write in sporadically (it was much more frequent when I had a dark cloud that followed me even in the sunshine because I needed to remind myself more than ever in those days)…Mostly, I write in it little things that my sons say or do, spoonerisms that make me smile, moments that I wish I could promise I will never, ever forget…It is my version of the Cloud, my back up disc, a place to store what my innate data banks could lose in the mists of time as my children create more moments to treasure…

So, no New Year’s Resolutions for me, I’m done with those…I’m not setting false promises and time induced goals…I am who I want to be, there will always be room for improvement, but I am imperfectly perfectly Lucy…I will keep making my sporadic journal entries about the moments when my heart soars and I wish I could videotape every beautiful moment with my sons…and I will keep wishing I had written more, captured more…But when I read it back, the essence will be what I treasure most…

This New Year’s Day, I awoke with one of my boys on each side of me…woken by NYE fireworks throughout the wee hours it seemed they had crawled in for comfort…four in a bed…our family bed…and my first thought was “How many more mornings will this happen?”…I know it will stop one day…My heart sank – my loving boys will become young men, grown men, move out, move on (and rightly so)…And then my youngest stirred, reached across me & found his brother’s hand…”Bill, I love you”…”I love you too, Joe” …”Happy New Year, Bill”…”Happy New Year, Joe”…

That’s why I am not making resolutions…well maybe just one…if my boys start the New Year with love in their hearts, I’m not getting it all wrong…I might even be getting it quite right…I’m raising my boys as my heart tells me I should…Lee and I walk hand in hand & make parenting mistakes together, and hand in hand we put them right (sometimes after a wordy exchange or a silent one) but when they lay their heads on their pillows they our children fall asleep knowing, feeling that we love them, and they know they love each other…we all feel loved in our home…And the best resolution I can make is to live my life with love, in love, for love…

All you need is love…

OMx

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